February 26th 2015
It all started when I thought he was a gummy bear.
There I was, perusing the Internet super normally on a Tuesday night.
And that’s when I saw it:
Rumor has it, John Travolta is set to star as the lead gummy bear in a new and upcoming film called:
Wait for it.
No one seems to give an actual fuck about this MOMENTOUS MILESTONE in his career.
We’re all too busy blowing a social gasket about his smooching mishap on the red carpet:
While making memes to go with it:
And when we’re not doing that, we’re spending a substantial amount time reliving the 2014 Oscars when he flubbed the ever-famous Idina Menzel’s name to:
Which indubitably led to a spiral of even MORE misnaming memes like this:
Lest we forget the plethora of moments and movies that should MORE than redeem this questionable, questionable man?
Which is why I created a list.
(And mostly because there are just far too many memes and gifs that exist for me not to share, use and abuse like this):
7 Reasons John Travolta Deserves A Damn Break
1. He’s a great listener
2. He comes in a variety of shapes and (hair) sizes
3. He does the hokey pokey AND he turns himself around
4. He’s just a natural with words
5. He used to look like this
6. He’s great with his hands…
7. He appreciates the finer things in life
He’s not so bad.
He’s a gummy bear.
And for that, we should throw the man a swift congratulations…and a clean t-shirt too…