4 Ridiculous Dads That Probably Won’t Get A Father’s Day Gift

June 17th 2015

WHO’S YA DADDY?!

Don’t answer that.

Just breaking the ice.

Anyway.

Dad’s day is just around the river bend and chances are great your Father figure deserves something freakin fantastic.

Like power tools:

He's got the power.

He’s got the power.

 

Or PJs:

Perfect for dad.

Perfect with his hunting hat.

 

Or a donut:

Just what he wanted.

Just what he wanted.

 

But.

Not every dad deserves these things.

And I think you’ll agree.

Here’s what I mean:

4 Dad’s That Probably Don’t Deserve Dad’s Day Gifts

1. Walter White

He doesn't wear the pants.

Doesn’t wear the pants in this relationship.

 

True, this dad from the show Breaking Bad made a general effort to snack with his breakfast-obsessed kiddo on reg:

Standard behavior.

Standard behavior.

 

 

Dually indulging in deep conversations:

Such a sweetie.

Such a sweetie.

 

YET.

Cooking mass amounts of meth on the side.

Jeopardizing the safety of his family.

Killing bitches.

And claiming shit like:

Yeah yeah, we know.

Mmmmk Dad.

 

And worst of all, wasting a perfectly good pizza!

Monster.

HE’S A MONSTER.

 

And for that? I say his pancake-induced son should forget the gift, and spend the extra money on classy maple syrup or fresh squeezed OJ or just a lot more bacon:

Give him a second.

He’s thinkin about it.

 

 

2. Dr. Evil

ONE MILLION DOLLARS.

ONE MILLION DOLLARS.

 

 

In addition to the fact he’s got the word evil as a legalized last name, this subpar faja has also been exposed on Jerry Springer by his biological son for his dramatic, dramatic ways:

It's true.

It’s true.

 

Chosen a mini me to spite him as an easy replacement:

Proof.

The lesser of two evils.

 

 

And attempted to make up for it with genuinely uncomfortable gestures:

Let's...not.

Let’s…not.

Ditch him. And his gift.

3. Darth Vader

In summary:

darth-vader-guess-my-dad-wasnt-so-bad-after-all

The post games it by telling them:

giphy

And wraps up the convo by being like:

I mean no, we don't forgive you.

Great talk.

 

He’s the worst.

Just.

The worst.

Except maybe:

4. This Guy

worst dad

Baby’s got back.

 

And there you have it. Four Father’s that should probably get recliner privileges revoked, steak served cold and remote control placed in a hidden abyss.

But for all the other champion-esque parents?

This is for you:

Game on.

Game on.